What
dance did you do that shocked your parents? Depending
on your age, it might have been slam dancing, break
dancing, the lambada, the smurf, or the twist. The current
dance craze is always changing because young people
through history have proclaimed their uniqueness by
trying new things. They are tenacious and highly adept
at change because their attitudes haven't yet hardened.
Babies
are a great example of tenacity and adaptability. Watch
a toddler try something new. It tries and fails and
keeps trying until it figures out what works. When they
get to school age, children on the playground stretch
and explore, eager to extend their boundaries. Today's
teens experiment with purple hair and rings worn everywhere
but on the fingers, forcing their parents to confront
the discomforts of change.
So,
why do we get rigid as we get older? Why do we start
seeing the status quo as safe and protective, something
to be defended instead of challenged? Is it possible
to again become more flexible, to recapture that exhilaration
we felt on the dance floor and on the playground, that
sublime sense that everything is possible? The answer
is yes, we can feel excitement about change again.
Think
about the kind of changes that make you uneasy, even
afraid. What do you actually fear? Losing hard-earned
success? Safety? Control? Have you finally figured out
how things are and suddenly they're something else?
Is your sense of identity in jeopardy? Your answers
take you to the next step.
Consider
the following tactics for bringing back a childlike
(not childish) energy to dealing with the unpleasant
changes in your life.
1.
Try to get another perspective. Is there someone
you can ask for an outside or second opinion? Can you
stand on your head, figuratively if not literally, to
get a different viewpoint?
2.
Check your assumptions. Could they be preventing
you from seeing excitement and opportunity amidst the
turmoil? Make a list and then challenge them, one by
one, with childlike intensity.
3.
Imagine the kind of people who would welcome this particular
change. What would excite them? What advantages
would they see? How different are they from you? Which
of their perceived benefits would and could get you
excited too?
Remember
the last time you were totally enthusiastic about something.
Concentrate on that feeling as you mentally switch to
a new image of the change you are facing. Recapture
the sense of adventure that was part of your life when
you stepped out on the dance floor and let yourself
go.
To
learn more about Sheila Murray Bethel's audios,
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Bethel Institute 2000 |